Does anyone out there speak Preschooler?

preschoolerMy daughter, Brynn, and I are locked in a bedtime battle.  She comes out, I march her back in, and we do this until we’re both dizzy.  I went through this phase with my son (7), and I emerged triumphant, so I remain hopeful.  She has the standard arsenal of reasons why she should be exempted from the bedtime rule.  Thirsty; bored; not tired; teddy bumped his paw.  These tactics I can withstand.

But last night she perplexed me.  She got me, and she knows it.

I heard her footsteps, slow and calculated; I heard her bedroom door creak.  She appeared in the hallway, her brow furrowed in irritation, ready to take care of business like some three-foot Tommy Lee Jones.  She crept toward me with one hand over her rib cage.

She got right in my face, indignant.  “Mommy?”

“Yes, dear?”

“My heart itches.”


Image courtesy of Jeanne Claire Maarbes at


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6 thoughts on “Does anyone out there speak Preschooler?

  1. Lina March 15, 2013 at 12:07 pm Reply

    Haha, I think I’ve heard this one before. I worked as a pre-k teacher for many many years (off and on of course, because it was a love/hate thing). I was pretty good at it, and I won the hearts of many 3-5 year olds throughout the years. Needless to say, I’m fluent in preschooler-ese. I recently wrote an article on EC about how teaching taught me to be a mom–as I sit her with my grumpy, refusing to sleep, three-month old. One of the things I am going to use when she’s older to help get her to sleep, is patting her back. I was able to get all ten of my five-year olds asleep in thirty minutes, sometimes less. I had each of them lie down, and then I would pat their backs until they were asleep. I plan on doing the same with Go.

    • Julia Weston March 15, 2013 at 3:23 pm Reply

      You’re the Preschooler Whisperer lol! You know, I’ve gotten away from the back-patting since she’s gotten a bit older. That’s definitely something to consider; I keep thinking of this as a little battle of wills, but there’s a whole different way to look at it. Thanks for stopping by and for leaving a thoughtful comment!

  2. MC March 16, 2013 at 12:05 pm Reply

    I’m struggling with the bedtime with our almost 2 year old. It took forever to get our now 4 year old to go to bed and sleep in her room and even now once in a while she will come with ideas to get up. Kids are cute and their excuses are cute but it does get old! Good luck!

    • Julia Weston March 16, 2013 at 12:59 pm Reply

      Does it ever! Mine are 4 and 7, and I now consider bedtime to be when “mommy and daddy time” kicks in, when the hubs and I can just sit down and hang out and talk uninterrupted. But my daughter doesn’t see things that way quite yet. I’m determined to prevail. Thanks for stopping by!

  3. joeyfullystated March 24, 2013 at 11:45 pm Reply

    Fascinating! I’ve never heard that one. She must have a creative mind 🙂

    • Julia Weston March 25, 2013 at 6:44 am Reply

      She comes up with some doozies. Cracks me up. Thanks for stopping by!

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